I recently had a very quirky conversation with a female colleague coach about power and gender.
She was talking about "The 48 laws of power" by Roberte Greene and Joost Elffers and made the point that men would understand these laws instinctively, whereas women have to learn them. To illustrate, she asked "What do you guess the first law is?" (You might like to try and guess it yourself before reading on.)
I didn't get it right, but when she told me it, I had to agree I did instinctively understand it! (The first law is "Never outshine the master".) And I also agreed that, although there are plenty of men who (like me) fall into this trap as the accidental result of trying too hard to impress rather than outshine the master, most men would probably recognise the rule - at least in hindsight!
Then I thought about it some more and suggested "But surely most women also get this ... you only have to watch how careful most women are about this when around an alpha male in a social setting". "Oh" she said "that's not about power, that's just about sex!"
Which shut me up completely. Until now, when I've thought of the perfect come back question I should have asked her then, which is: "What exactly do you think male power games are ultimately about, if not about sex?!"
