I had a somewhat frustrating coaching experience last week. I was working with a group, and each person was taking turns to be peer coached by the group. The group was working very hard at asking "good" (ie open) questions, but the frustration built in me because despite this there was very little new insight being generated, and no progress towards seeing (or doing) things differently. It set me thinking about how often we focus on open questions, and how it might be a more useful to focus instead on open answers.
Reflecting back on that session, there were two unhelpful things happening. One was that, however the question was asked, the coachee was giving their answer extremely quickly and with great certainty. The implication is that the answer is already "known", and if it is already known it is (by definition) not going to result in new awareness. The more certain the answer, the less "open" it is. As coaches we need to ensure that coachees do not feel they should know the answer. It is more helpful to approach every answer with curiosity, ie "I wonder what the answer is". Coaching is a joint exploration, not a Q&A session!
Of course, the other unhelpful thing happening was that the coach(es) asking the questions could recognise that the coachee was missing something, so worked harder and harder at asking questions which would produce the "right" new awareness. Although in form these were still open questions, they were now looking for a particular answer (ie they were really closed). Not surprisingly, these leading questions only re-inforced the pattern of interaction, as neither party was now exploring with curiosity - both were assuming that they knew the answer, so it was anything but open!
So how can you break this pattern? One way, as nearly always, is to use the power of "naming and taming", eg "I notice you are answering very quickly, how might your answer change if you gave yourself more time?". Or "how else might you answer, if you assumed your first thought was only one of several possibilities?"
Another way is to remember coaches are not lawyers! There is a saying that lawyers should never ask a witness a question to which they do not already know the answer. But that is because the last thing they want is to reveal a different way of looking at things! As a coach, the key is to remember that, whatever form your question takes, you shouldn't already know the answer. Framed like this, even a question which in form is closed (ie can be answered Yes or No) is in substance open - because the answer is open.
Finally, my preferred way of avoiding this completely is by setting up the whole session differently. It's why I so often ask people to do something (draw a picture, experience something physical etc) and then get them to talk about it. It helps both because it is using the right brain rather than left, but also because rather than facing each other as we do in a typical Q&A based session, we are forced to explore it side by side together. And that's coaching!
